01 May 2009

Tormented. out May 22. take it away. please ! please!


Oh dear. Essentially Hollyoaks with blood or an episode of Skins meets Scream, Brit- high school horror Tormented has its target audience firmly in view. Sadly this does not seem to include anyone a; over the age of 15 or b; seen more than a handful of decent movies (horror or otherwise). Even the basest teen soap has more wit and vigour than this frankly embarrassing offering.

The plot, such as it is, concerns the suicide of bullied teen Darren Mullet and his apparent re-appearance as a vengeful zombie ghost thing eager to get back at the cast of gormless, braying good looking bastards who did for him in the first place.

Displaying varying degrees of idiocy, the clich├ęd bunch of Emos, slappers, geeks and jocks get bumped off in disappointingly boring fashion. The final ‘twist’ is laughable and seeks to act as some sort of get out clause for the mirthless crap that preceded it.

Avoid like the plague. It’ll probably be huge.

Note: Incredibly Empire magazine which I enjoy and respect gave this pile an extremely generous and good review. Why ??! Seriously, any horror  fan (or sentient being) will be switched off by this. The fact that it's rated a 15 should tell you that it's not in the so shit or rank that it's good category...whatever....